Deck of Chaos (5e Equipment)

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April Fools!
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Wondrous item (Deck of cards), legendary

Before you draw a card, you must declare how many cards you intend to draw and then draw them randomly. Any cards drawn in excess of this number have no effect. Otherwise, as soon as you draw a card from the deck, its magic takes effect. You must draw each card no more than 1 hour after the previous draw. If you fail to draw the chosen number, the remaining number of cards fly from the deck on their own and take effect all at once. After all declared draws took effect, cards drawn return to the deck.

1d100 Cardname Description
1 Alpha advantage on Strength(Athletics), Dexterity(Acrobatics), Strength and con saving throws, can’t be charmed or frightened except by himself, strong beliefs it’s really persuasive. disadvantage on all Wisdom skills and saving throws. Lasts for 24h.
2 Alchemist Gift 1d4 random rare or very rare potions appear at your feet.
3 Alteration Roll 1d4 on odd grow one size bigger, on even you get one size smaller.
4 Bet Play blackjack or 21 once, bet ANYTHING you want, whatever your bet is, if you win you get double everything you placed as a bet. If you lose, you can only get them back by using wish, or you can find it on a random place in the same plane as they were taken, you know the direction and just the direction.
5 Beta All skills made with Strength, Dexterity, Wisdom, Charisma, are always natural 1's, no knowledge on tools, user can try but always terribly fail, romantic interest reject you in the most hurtful ways. Lasts for 24 hours.
6 Big Boy You gain 80lbs, your armor no longer suits you and must re adjust it.
7 Bitter Ballad Acts on everyone in a 30-foot-radius one time per creature. The card starts yelling insults using the vicious mockery cantrip once at each creature.
8 Blessed with Curves You become thicc.
9 Business A merchant appears, roll 2d6, it has 2 items of the rarity in Table:Business below. The players desires each one with each rolled quality, at the corresponding price, if you rolled doubles half the price.
10 Card’s Beast A monster with a CR equal to your level forms out of the card.
11 Cartographer’s Gift Roll d100, on 70 or higher user gets a random boon.
12 Cool kid Hat Acts upon turning. The card morphs into a propeller beanie in the most epic way possible, while equipped it gives you +2 feet of jump height, and can hover at 5 inches off the ground for 3 seconds before falling because of this gravity thing. Intimidation (Charisma) checks are always 1 and no one can be frightened of the creature wearing this. It can change its size so it may fit anyone.
13 Compass your nipples become a compass pointing at one of these specific things, If you didn’t have nipples before, congratulations! You do now. Roll 1d10 from the Table:Compass below.
14 Decay Acts on first sight. Roll 1d4 random equipment in your inventory gets downgraded one rarity on 1-3 and 2 rarities on 4. If it would cause it to fall below common, it disintegrates instead.
15 Devil’s Gambit A devil appears and offers you a juicy deal.
16 Discount Coupon The first 1d20 things you touch have 100% discount doesn’t work on things on your inventory.
17 Doppelganger Trouble Somewhere in the world, an exact duplicate of you appears. It has the same appearance, equipment, and knowledge as you. The only difference is that its alignment is opposite yours. Lawful becomes chaotic, and good becomes evil, or vice-versa. This duplicate is drawn to you and his objectives are opposite to yours.
18 Dreamwalker’s Trial You are knocked into a coma where you must face your greatest fear to awaken, you have disadvantages on rolls inside the coma/dream. You may wake up when you overcome your fear.
19 Echoes of the Void You can now speak a strange language no one has heard of.
20 Eclipse “(DAY)Moon covers the sun /(NIGHT)Moon turns bloody, the sky turns bloody red, an eclipse that not only covers the sky, but corrupts the soul itself.”

The following effects take place.

  • Madness: Whoever draw the card suffers terrifying hallucinations.
  • Bloodstorm: Blood starts raining from the sky, most creature must succeed a DC 15 Constitution saving throw or receive 1d6 necrotic damage. Most creature will try to seek shelter.
  • Beasts: All beasts and creatures become hostile if they weren't before and, behave erratically.
  • Darkness: A dim light covers the world you cannot see past 60 feet.
  • Awaken: Undead and Monsters start appearing seemingly from nowhere all over the world.
  • Death: All Necrotic magic and effects are amplified (DM discretion).

All effects lasts for 1d4 minutes, after this time everything goes back to normal.

21 Electric Economy Roll 1d100 and consult Table:Electric Economy for the result.
22 Ethereal Essence You and your equipment become intangible; you can pass through non-magical materials. You gain flying speed equal to your movement speed for the duration. Lasts for 30 minutes.
23 Euryale (Deck of Many Things) The card’s medusa-like visage curses you. You take a -2 penalty on saving throws while cursed in this way. Only a god or the magic of The Fates card can end this curse.
24 FF tickets On touch the card splits into 1d4 magic tickets that allow you to summon a magnificent mansion out of space and time, so you can fast forward 8h and have a long rest or think about life, ignores all danger, harmful creatures stay where they were, everything stays the same, once 8h have passed every one that was inside the mansion get kicked out.
25 Fiery Being You become a pyromaniac pyromancer. You learn 2 fire related cantrips.
26 Fool (Deck of Many Things) You lose 10,000 XP, discard this card, and draw from the deck again, counting both draws as one of your declared draws. If losing that much XP would cause you to lose a level, you instead lose an amount that leaves you with just enough XP to keep your level.
27 Force You gain telekinesis but only with dwarves. (You do not need to be a dwarf).
28 Fortune Card automatically flips when drawn “How thoughtful of you, sharing is caring”. Each player, independently of their distance with you draws a card. Including you, of course.
29 Future Angel wings You gain non-functional wings for the day.
30 Grip The card wraps around your hands and disappears, Roll 1d4, on odd you lose 1 finger, on even you gain 1 finger.
31 Guidance Acts on Sight. Everyone on a 30-foot-radius sphere centered on you that has 3 or more Intelligence, completely forget where they are, how they got there, and how to get out. Duration: 1d6 weeks.
32 Heartful “The nearest princess to your location falls in…. In Lo…. In…. Nah (???), “Indiana Jones” theme song starts playing.” A giant hearts forms out of the card and starts rolling towards you like a boulder and you get a hat and whip, of course.
33 Hidden Talent Gain a feat, no need to meet requirements.
34 Hold Up for 1 minute after rolling the first initiative after drawing this card, a 320-foot forcefield centered on the card is formed, no damage, debuff or hostile interaction can be made within the area.
35 Identity Flux You swap minds with the closest creature, lasts for 10 minutes.
36 Idiot (Deck of Many Things) Permanently reduce your Intelligence by 1d4 + 1 (to a minimum score of 1). You can draw one additional card beyond your declared draws.
37 “Immutable” Armor You gain a full plate +3 Anti Sword Armor, it becomes ethereal when hit by a sword, letting it hit effortlessly, with this, additionally, totally for free, you get Shield of Flying +3.
38 Infinite Pocket The card turns into a Bag of Holding.
39 Ink Nightmare The card morphs into you, giving you a tattoo of the thing you dislike the most.
40 Judgment Roll 1d4 on 1 you’re extremely sober, effects determined by the DM, 2 you’re sober, 3 you’re drunk, 4 you’re extremely drunk. Goes away after long rest.
41 Jester (Deck of Many Things) You gain 10,000 XP, or you can draw two additional cards beyond your declared draws.
42 Key (Deck of Many Things) A rare or rarer magic weapon with which you are proficient appears in your hands. The DM chooses the weapon.
43 Left hook to the jaw “A hand materializes as you look the card, you don’t have time to react” You are knocked unconscious.
44 Let’s take a break You get 1d6 levels of exhaustion
45 Little gift You must take 2 additional draws.
46 Ponder the orb A crystal ball appears and shows you false information.
47 Magical Chaos 1d6 random spells shootout at you from the card (Determined by the DM).
48 Magnetic link Acts on the first one who touch it. For 3d12 hours you can’t take off your armor(if made out of metal), everyone in a 40-foot-radius sphere That’s holding of something made out of metal it’s attracted to you moving at 5 feet per turn, range attacks with metal based projectiles have advantage if made against you and a 35% chance of targeting you instead if aiming for someone else. Some small metal items might stick to you.
49 Manual Only you know your next card name before it takes any effect, and may decide to not use this roll and make another one, you must use this new one if you decide to change.
50 Mark the spot Gain access to information about valuables and the place they are, you can easily enter, locate and retrieve these objects, as soon as they’re in your inventory you are marked for death by their previous owners. Use Table:Mark the Spot below.
51 Memory You have a flashback to your librarian days (Which you do not have).
52 Mind “As an action you can now read minds (Doesn’t affect other players or otters).” (Don’t say this) however you are always wrong. Lasts for 1 hour.
53 Mysterious Magic man’s bag “As you look at this card you see very well dressed man trip before your eyes, dropping a mysterious bag, he looks at you with embarrassment and runs away, leaving the bag behind” only the person who saw this card is able to lift the “mysterious bag”, it’s completely ethereal to others. This grants you a 1d10 level spell slot (10 = reroll).
54 Moon (Deck of many things) You are granted the ability to cast the wish spell 1d3 times.
55 Mr. Paws A cute kitten pops out of the card, it follows you everywhere, it has a chance to have lawful evil alignment, its goals are beyond your understanding…
56 Mute You can only communicate with others by mimicking people in a hostile, passive-aggressive tone for 10 minutes.
57 Nice The word ‘NICE’ is shouted by some unseen thing which is standing next to you, dealing 1d6 thunder damage to you and all creatures within 5 feet of you, and is audible up to 5 miles away.
58 Path of the Versatile Gain either 3 proficiency or 1 new proficiency and 1 expertise on skills or tools.
59 Power Balance Roll d6 to determine ability score, subtract 1d4 from it and add it to (roll d6 ability score). Goes away after 1d4 days.
60 Prophetic insight You know the specific location of a legendary item in a plane of your choice.
61 Rebel Shadow Your shadow takes on a malevolent sentience, filled with malice toward you. While it cannot physically touch or speak, it will subtly interfere with your actions. The shadow uses trickery, misdirection, and environmental manipulation to hinder your progress, causing minor obstacles and distractions.
62 Renewal Roll 1d4, random equipment in your inventory gets upgraded to the next rarity on 1-3 and 2 rarities on 4. If it surpass artifact rarity, its stats are upgraded.
63 Resistance “you get the diamond curse” Your skin turns to a diamond like material, very hard and very shiny giving you +2 to your AC, disadvantage on Dexterity (Stealth) rolls and Dexterity saving throws, and advantage on Constitution saving throws. Can be cured.
64 Risk “A strange silhouette materializes, only the first one who looked at the card can see it, It presents this user 4 options…”
  1. Draw 2 cards from Deck of Many Things
  2. 2 Wheel of chance rolls
  3. Very powerful item with a very powerful curse
  4. Respectfully decline
65 Rogue (Deck of Many Things) A nonplayer character of the DM’s choice becomes hostile toward you. The identity of your new enemy isn’t known until the NPC or someone else reveals it. Nothing less than a wish spell or Divine Intervention can end the NPC’s hostility toward you.
66 Royal Judgment Acts on whoever touched the card first. You become haunted by a dead queen that really thinks you killed her, she is really annoying and is considered a great distraction if you are trying to concentrate.
67 Ruin (Deck of Many Things) All forms of wealth that you carry or own, other than magic items, are lost to you. Portable property vanishes. Businesses, buildings, and land you own are lost in a way that alters reality the least. Any documentation that proves you should own something lost to this card also disappears.
68 Second Chance Cast death ward on self for free. (1 use).
69 Shield One effect currently affecting you, or the next effect you get gets cancelled.
70 Sigma advantage on every Charisma skills and expertise on all tools and arts. Lasts for 24Hs.
71 Skeleton Key The card turns into a Skeleton Key (1d4 uses, immediately after last use it explodes dealing 1d10 of fire damage in a 10ft radius).
72 Skull (Deck of Many Things) You summon an avatar of death-a ghostly humanoid skeleton clad in a tattered black robe and carrying a spectral scythe. It appears in a space of the DM’s choice within 10 feet of you and attacks you, warning all others that you must win the battle alone. The avatar fights until you die or it drops to 0 hit points, whereupon it disappears. If anyone tries to help you, the helper summons its own avatar of death. A creature slain by an avatar of death can’t be restored to life.
73 Specialist You gain another subclass from your current class chosen at random. You start getting its benefits as you level up at its corresponding levels. If you are multiclassing you must choose only one class which you will get a subclass from.
74 Split Decision “As soon as you draw this card, al light around you seems to fade out, a cloaked creature appears and says -you have to make a choice, and make it quick- an orb appears on one hand and a morphing item on the other” You have to choose to either lose one of your proficiencies(random), or your party losses a critical important item. You have a minute to make your decision or both effects occur.
75 Subtle celebration 1d100 fireworks shoot out of the card exploding everywhere, casually alerting every evil alignment creature within 500ft, double distance if used inside a cave or dungeon, if hit by one of the fireworks you take 1d2 fire damage.
76 Survival Instinct You gain the ability to tell what direction the wind is blowing.
77 Sweet Gift The card turns into a box of chocolates, each with a random effect decided by the DM. Contains 12 chocolates.
78 Talons (Deck of Many Things ) Every magic item you wear or carry disintegrates. Artifacts in your possession aren’t destroyed but do vanish.
79 Tasty You taste delicious.
80 Teleporting Ring You’re attuned to a Teleporting Ring: Think of a location you want to teleport to, you got it? Perfect, the ring teleports to that location, but you remain in the exact same place as you where before, you can recall it by placing your hand in front of your face. Additionally, if a weapon or item you have should or has the ability to return or teleport to your hand when throwed, you have a chance to teleport or magically pulled to your weapon instead.
81 Temporal Mastery Gain 1 use of action surge if card is played in combat, or have the equivalent of 5 minutes where time is stopped outside of combat.
82 The Dreamer "Every blink is a risk. Every moment of stillness, a trap." After making a skill check with a skill you don’t have proficiency with roll a d100 on a 25 or lower you fall asleep. This is a short rest. You can be awaken if you take damage by making a DC 15 Constitution saving throw. This Curse lasts for 2 weeks or can be removed by remove curse or wish.
83 The Fates (Deck of Many Things) Reality’s fabric unravels and spins anew, allowing you to avoid or erase one event as if it never happened. You can use the card’s magic as soon as you draw the card or at any other time before you die.
84 The Feather You get a scroll of falling with style, when falling from great heights, if equipped, you gain +20 to Charisma (Performance) checks until you touch the ground.
85 The Gate You gain one casting of the gate spell without need of material components, but the following change is in place. Rather than choosing the destination, any that step through the gate are transported to a random plane of existence. All will end up in the same plane, and the gate remains open for the normal duration of one minute. During that time, it creates a pocket of safety similar to Leomund’s Tiny Hut.

Roll 1d20 and use Table:The Gate to determine the result.

86 The Magician The card multiplies into 10 different cards, one of which grants a magical ring, the other ones gives you the poisoned status effect. When you touch one the other ones disappear.
87 The Raven When you draw this card a mysterious crow starts following you as an omen, it doesn't speak and his mind cannot be read (It doesn't mean anything and won't do anything). It’s completely immune against any means of harm and cannot be controlled.
88 The Smith’s Revenge An approaching whistle sound appears high on the sky, An anvil weighing 120kg drops on your foot, you are grappled as it is falling dealing 4d10 bludgeoning damage, everyone within 15 feet must make a DC 15 Dexterity saving throw, on fail they take half damage and fall prone, on success they take half of the original damage, no effect.
89 The Traveler You are transported onto a different plane of existence (Determined by the DM).
90 The Void (Deck of Many Things) This black card spells disaster. Your soul is drawn from your body and contained in an object in a place of the DM’s choice. One or more powerful beings guard the place. While your soul is trapped in this way, your body is incapacitated. A wish spell can’t restore your soul, but the spell reveals the location of the object that holds it. You draw no more cards.
91 Throne (Deck of Many Things) You gain proficiency in the Persuasion skill, and you double your proficiency bonus on skill checks made with that skill. In addition, you gain rightful ownership of a small keep somewhere in the world. However, the keep is currently in the hands of monsters, which you must clear out before you can claim the keep as yours.
92 True Potential “The card reads: Unlock your True Potential”. You permanently gain either one extra bonus action or reaction.
93 Twisted Flames A powerful creature becomes your enemy. This creature seeks your ruin and plagues your life, savoring your suffering before attempting to slay you. This enmity lasts until either you or the creature dies. Roll 1d14 and use Table:Twisted Flames below to determine the category.
94 Union A ring pops out of the card, it appears stupendously magical. It has no worth or magic whatsoever. Detect magic does not appear to work on this item.
95 Vizier (Deck of Many Things ) At any time you choose within one year of drawing this card, you can ask a question in meditation and mentally receive a truthful answer to that question. Besides information, the answer helps you solve a puzzling problem or other dilemma. In other words, the knowledge comes with Wisdom on how to apply it.
96 Wanted You look exactly like the most wanted criminal in the area you are in for 45 minutes.
97 Wind Current A strong wind current is against you and only you CONSTANTLY. You have disadvantage on all checks, you have trouble hearing, seeing and speaking as if you were in a hurricane, every direction you walk is considered difficult terrain and your clothes and hair(if any) strongly billow. Last for 1d6 hours.
98 Wind Prophet “You hear a low pitched voice telling you about an ancient item”. You learn of a powerful artifact in the elemental Plane of Air.
99 WTF “Blank card” No apparent effect. After drawing this card, when the DM snaps at a certain moment, for d20 real time minutes, anything said by the players might become canon after this time has passed, DM choice.
100 You’re a plant pot! You immediately turn into a plant pot, but retain the ability to speak, can be broken with wish, or with necrotic magic. If you receive radiant spell a little flower begins to grow.
Table:Business
1d6 Rarity
1 common
2 uncommon
3 rare
4 very rare
5 legendary
6 artifact
Table:Compass
1d10 Direction
1 North.
2 The nearest apple tree.
3 The most uncomfortable chair nearby.
4 The nearest rock that vaguely resembles a face.
5 The closest person currently thinking about frogs.
6 A cloud that, for some reason, looks like a window cleaner.
7 The nearest llama.
8 The nearest creature with compass nipples (that isn’t you).
9 The best chess player in the area.
10 A specific person (chosen by the DM).
Table:Electric Economy
1d100 Direction
1 Every coin that your party/allies have turn into electrum coins, not it’s equivalent, just electrum, they turn normal when effect ends.
2-45 All YOUR economy turns into its equivalent in electrum.
46-90 All economy is now based on electrum coins for 1d4 sessions. All prices, inventory change to its equivalent in electrum.
90-100 You get 1 electrum coin.
Table:Mark the Spot
1d10 Location (treasure)
1 Cult (ancient scrolls and knowledge).
2 Black marketers (gain access to black market).
3 Authorities (shipping yards).
4 Royalty (kings personal treasure).
5 Hellish creatures (crypt, tomb, sacred cemetery).
6 Magic fauna (temple, lake, tree community, magical nature items).
Table:The Gate
1d20 Plane
1-3 Random location on the material plane, determined by the DM.
4-5 You are teleported to a laboratory where a mad scientist is rambling, he begins to test on you as soon as he sees you but at the last moment you teleport back.
6-7 Feywild.
8-9 Shadowfell.
10 Air.
11 Earth.
12 Fire.
13 Water.
14 Mechanus.
15 Elisium.
16 Mount Celestia.
17 Limbo.
18 The Nine Hells.
19 Arcadia.
20 Sigil.
Table:Twisted Flames
1d14 Type
1 Aberration.
2 Beast.
3 Celestial.
4 Construct.
5 Dragon.
6 Elemental.
7 Fey.
8 Fiend.
9 Giant.
10 Humanoid.
11 Monstrosity.
12 Ooze.
13 Plant.
14 Undead.
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