Toilet Seat (3.5e Equipment)

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April Fools!
This content is not designed for use in regular games, and may affect overall balance and gameplay. Take caution when using this material.
Kohler Elongated Artful
Front Closed Toilet Seat
by, on Flickr
Toilet Seat
Simple Two-Handed
Critical: ×2
Range Increment:
Type: Bludgeoning
Hardness: 5
Size Cost1 Damage Weight1 hp
Fine * 1 * 1
Diminutive * 1d2 * 1
Tiny * 1d3 * 1
Small 1 gp 1d4 1 lb. 2
Medium 1 gp 1d6 2 lb. 5
Large 1 gp 1d8 4 lb. 10
Huge * 2d6 * 20
Gargantuan * 3d6 * 40
Colossal * 4d6 * 80
  1. The SRD only gives a means to determine costs and weights of weapons for Large and Small versions based on the Medium weapons. Any other supplied values are the author's best determination.

This seat is made either of plastic, hard-wood or in some cases ceramic material. Although never intended to see life as a weapon, it has commendable damage potential in the hands of someone crazy enough to violate a toilet and beat someone to death with it. A toilet seat is an improvised weapon.

You can use a toilet seat to make trip attacks. If you are tripped during your own trip attempt, you may drop the toilet seat to avoid being tripped.

Special: Caution. May not be clean.

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