Talk:Raku-n (3.5e Race)

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This is my first try at making a race, I think it came out pretty well, but I want to hear what you guys have to say, so leave your oppinions and comments, and please, no flaming or just random cursing, try to be constructive with your criticism. —The preceding unsigned comment was added by Sevant (talkcontribs) . Please sign your posts!

"Ooh Shiney" needs to be expanded on. What is the DC of the will save? And how -exactly- does a failed save affect the character? "avoid being mesmerized by it. " is not descriptive enough, specific actions must be stated. Unless, of course, there is a status condition called mesmerize with its own description, in which case you need to link to it. --TheWarforgedArtificer 11:35, 15 September 2009 (MDT)
Thanks, I hadn't thought of that, I expanded it and described it more, does that help? —The preceding unsigned comment was added by Sevant (talkcontribs) . Please sign your posts!
Ehhh...it works, but the wording is quite cumbersome. I can fix that, though. On an unrelated note, two things you should be aware of when posting in a talk page: one, indent by putting one more colon than the previous comment (or just one colon if you are responding to a first comment). two, sign your posts by putting four tildes ~~~~ at the end; this will generate your name and the time of posting. --TheWarforgedArtificer 12:36, 15 September 2009 (MDT)
EDIT:reworded the racial trait. Also, for the rest of the article, I have one word for you: "Spellcheck" ;) --TheWarforgedArtificer 12:50, 15 September 2009 (MDT)
Sorry, I just hadn't thought to spell check it, I can do that just give me a bit Sevant 18:06, 15 September 2009 (MDT)
Edit-Okay, I checked it there were no spelling errors, sorry about all the trouble I caused you Sevant 11:56, 17 September 2009 (MDT)
Step 1: copy text into a word processor. Step two, hit spellcheck button. Step three, look at the spelling corrections I already made. I did everything up to religion, finish the rest yourself. --TheWarforgedArtificer 12:54, 17 September 2009 (MDT)
Okay, I did all the other parts, so there shouldn't be any more spelling errors, at least none that my word processor could find. Also, expanded more on Ooooh Shiny, that way it's a bit more formatted. Sevant 17:13, 19 September 2009 (MDT)
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