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I've made these changes:
- Merged ability score bonuses to one line.
- Reduced skill selection to Athletics and Intimidate
- Removed languages that don't exist in vanilla 4e.
- "one non-weapon proficiency" - don't know what this means, so removed it.
- Removed the total of +12 to skill bonuses, which is way over budget. Replaced it with Bluff as a bonus class skills.
- Creation of Alchemy doesn't make any sense (alchemy isn't a "non-weapon proficiency" - is the author thinking of 2nd edition?) so removed it.
- Added Living Construct trait instead of Regenerator.
- None of the powers made much sense, so I removed them. I'll try and think of a nice encounter power, and some racial utility powers, that fit their theme.
- The fluff says that "At first meeting with a homunculus, they tend to be intimidating, hostile, and untrustworthy", which is at odds with their Diplomacy trait, so removed it.
- Corrected the categories. There's nothing in the fluff to suggest that they have the Immortal origin, and their type is Humanoid, not Construct. Marasmusine (talk) 02:12, 19 July 2012 (MDT)