"Bob" (5e Deity)

From D&D Wiki

Jump to: navigation, search
Jester.jpg
April Fools!
This content is not designed for use in regular games, and may affect overall balance and gameplay. Take caution when using this material.

"Bob"[edit]

The portrait of J.R. "Bob" Dobbs

Alignment. Chaotic Neutral
Domains. Knowledge, Trickery
Divine Rank. Demigod


Born as a son of Xinucha-Chi-Xan M. Dobbs and Jane McBride Dobbs, J.R. "Bob" Dobbs has shown an exceptional talent of making a fortune with tele-stock marketing since he was a child. In 1953, "Bob" saw a vision of God on a handmade television set, which inspired him to write the "PreScripture" and later found the Church of the SubGenius.

"Bob" is the High Epopt and Living Slack Master, the living embodiment of "Slack". "Bob's" name must be written with quotation marks, no matter what.

Conspiracy[edit]

Today, everyone is familiar with a conspiracy or two. Eschelon, Chemtrail, Illuminati, what have you. What most people (or "pinks", as the Curch calls them) fail to understand, however, is that there is one conspiracy, a conspiracy to end all conspiracy, a conspiracy behind all other conspiracies, a conspiracy so grand and secretive that even the conspirators themselves have no idea what it really means.

Ever since the emergence of humanity on the surface of Earth, extraterrestrial beings have been watching on this pale blue dot in the universe. They have been manipulating those puny, hairless apes who pride themselves as "the most sentinent being on earth", into their servitude. All civilizations, cultures, politics, and even religions are little more than a great big lie created by the alien entities in order to enslave the humanity.

"Slack"[edit]

This is the big one. So big, that only "Bob" is qualified to fully understand, appreciate, and embody. Whatever "Slack" is, the conspiracy wants it barred from pinks. "Slack" is the key to break the chain of the conspiracy, the key that opens the door to free and comfy life. No more hard works, no more responsibility - with "Slack", it's just you and me, all alone, living the life as "Slack" guides.

FairUse.png
This page may resemble content endorsed by, sponsored by, and/or affiliated with the Church of the SubGenius franchise, and/or include content directly affiliated with and/or owned by Rev. Ivan Stang. D&D Wiki neither claims nor implies any rights to Church of the SubGenius copyrights, trademarks or logos, nor any owned by Rev. Ivan Stang. This site is for non profit use only. Furthermore, the following content is a derivative work that falls under, and the use of which is protected by, the Fair Use designation of US Copyright and Trademark Law. We ask you to please add the {{needsadmin}} template if there is a violation to this disclaimer within this page.
Copyright.png

Back to Main Page5e HomebrewDeities

Personal tools
Home of user-generated,
homebrew pages!
system reference documents
admin area
Terms and Conditions for Non-Human Visitors